Get all 41 Marisa Gasper releases available on Bandcamp and save 90%.
Includes unlimited streaming via the free Bandcamp app, plus high-quality downloads of I Live Here, Hints, Studio Study, Live for Love, Puddle of Struggles, Meandering: Menagerie Minus Mastery, Random Strange & Omegas, From Tapes, and 33 more.
1. |
Curse my head
02:34
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Curse my head
(Lyrics) 6/18/2020
It might be said, Rather be dead
I’d rather hide or run
It would be cruel, If it were you
*Can’t curse my head on anyone...
And in the light, I never fight
Just grapple with the denizens
And in the dark, the parcel, part
*
Can’t curse my head
On anyone
Rather be dead, or free
Instead I am, a kind of damned
To be stuck in me...
Kind to me is kindness’ seed
But truthfully I’m never done
I’m trapped by my creative mind
*
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2. |
Sadistic Statistic
02:40
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Sadistic Statistic
1999 & 2020
I’m just a hole
Who sold my soul
So conveniently addicted to your games
Your tongue of knives
Made me a wife
Completing domesticity in frame
*Paint [a] picture
Walk away
I’m not a victim
I’m just in pain
Perhaps I’m an accessory
An ornament for destiny
To decorate hard edges of your face
Why I made this stop in hell
Only through the years will tell
Walking through the fire in a haze
*
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3. |
Garment
02:45
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Garment
10/8/2020
Wearing an ill-fitted garment
That they’ll lay me to rest when I die
I have worn it in society parties
As clothing, as warmth, and a disguise
Though you think you can judge by what I’m wearing
Though you think you’ve got a handle on my kind
The secret to the ill-fitted garment
That it falls off, in time...
Wearing an ill-fitted garment
It’s a plague that surrounds me for so long
It’s made me want to die everyday since
I had the notion to put the damned thing on
Though maybe it’s a curse and a bane
The reason I’ve kept it on and will bequeath
The point of the ill-fitted garment
Is that it veils the true beauty underneath...
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4. |
Great escapist
04:02
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Great escapist
10/8/2020
In the fairytale haze
You’re destroyed by his face
He runs much too deep
On the surface
An ancient dull ache
You are captive of mate
Safe captive forever
*Great escapist
Smoke in a way
Keeps you in a daze
It dulls you to sleep
On the surface
You are stuck in a trance
An illusory dance
Between what is real...
*
The irony is
Reality’s iron fist
Will strike you when
You’re most unaware
It’s a waste of your fate
*
You’re not so bad on your own...
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5. |
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6. |
Clinton road (Live)
01:25
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Clinton Road
2/29/2020
“What say you,” said the gardener for the house beside the lake
He would tend that secret garden that they kept behind the gate
“If you look real close, you’ll see it, a door made out of gold”
“But don’t you go,” he said with spite, “down by Clinton Road”
I drove a ways and saw it, that golden door he spake
I saw other things I never saw when I was awake
There were haunting eyes, and sailing ships, and princes become toads
But I stayed wary for a time down by Clinton Road
Clinton Road is a path made of broken hearted
Those all lost and lonely on an unknown way uncharted
Many have attempted to break this complex code
‘Cause you’ll also find your destiny down on Clinton Road
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7. |
Hate (Live)
02:26
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Hate (lyrics)
6/4/19
Tried tolerance, you see but I’m offended
By your presence, and the cruelty you unload
I’m reminded of a spiritual perspective
That you are but a mirror, I suppose?
*Goodbye, my enemy, I love to hate you
Though your destruction would improve all that I see
Enumerate your faults, and then berate you
You bring out all the ugly that’s in me...
We might be but the same within defenses
We might be different cherries on a tree
But I find myself enraged by these pretenses
When you lie, and take and I give, in honesty
*
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8. |
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Lost in your masquerade
6/11/19
There is heaven in your lies
Hell beneath that fast disguise
But I’m caught in starlight trails
Transfixed by fairytales
And your eyes look so sweet under that light
And your kiss dispels any sign of fright
*But though the light might soon prevail
For the moment I am wandering in the dark
Lost in your masquerade...
Animal cunning makes a stew
Complicated by a brew
You seem damsel in distress
Demon dressed like a princess
Though this house with merely sticks will fall apart
But for now I have still given you my heart...
*
Lost in the masquerade you play me
Lost in the masquerade I can’t see through
Lost in the masquerade not true to what you show me
Lost in your masquerade blinded to the truth...
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9. |
Rest Awhile (Live)
02:47
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Rest awhile
7/24/2020
When the shadows seem to never end
And gracelessly slumber by
When time is hard like a cracking whip
As your feet and hands, they fly
When you’re tired of all the things you do
And nothing’s ever free
Just rest awhile, release it all, just
*rest awhile with me
When darkness seeps into everything
And all around you in hell
When evil is in every crack
And dust in every well
When you know that you are out of place,
Ugliness in all you see
Come rest awhile, escape it all, come
*
You’re worth so much more than you think
You need so much more than you drink
There is death inside all that smoke
There is life inside this hope...
When you find you want love
And you want to be free
Come rest awhile, be what you are, just
*
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10. |
Infant love (Live)
01:44
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My Infant Love
(“To love without knowing how to love wounds the person we love.” Thich Nhat Hanh)
4/3/19
Take a breath and realize that I’m not crying
When just moments ago I was dying
The bliss has come to speak, I was in so deep
wounding you with my infant love
My heart has broken too many times to go on
And I’ve continued though I’ve known that it was wrong
This company I kept, I have begged and I have wept,
Now it’s time to grow up, my infant love...
Infant love, the kind that keeps you guessing
Infant love, the “love” that is obsessing
Look away without a fear, no need to cry anymore tears,
Because I have given you up my infant love...
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Marisa Gasper Los Angeles, California
www.DelusionalAsUsual.Bandcamp.com. Marisa Gasper doesn't know the word fear, because she pursues her creative visions wherever they take her. Her works explore life, often through sound, and transcend traditional dichotomies in service to healing expansively the rifts between heart and mind, sacred and profane, G*d and philosophy... ~ bio by Betsy Kenoff-Boyd ~Thank You! ... more
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